Closure: Goodbye to the Guild

The best of times seem like forever ago...

Back in the year of 2011 I touched a little about the e-friendships that we as players find within our guilds. The general belief amongst folk is that our guild mates are simply interactive pixels. On that same train of thought we often then assume that e-friendships are unlike real friendships. A person then believes that at the end of the day, if you turn off the PC, the players of Azeroth do not exist again until the power comes back on. Yet we also often the opposite. We hear heart-warming stories that defunk the e-friendship puzzle. Interesting tales of in real life meet ups, happy marriages formed within guilds, as well as everlasting, life long friendships. An opposite frame of mind that believes that players are real people regardless.

I'm not here to say whether one opinion is right or wrong over the other. What I am doing and sharing with you all is my closure with the guild drama that came to a head over the last few days. Bare with me as I try to briefly explain how this all ties in with e-friendship.

Moving forward is never easy.

The Fallout
I've often mentioned it here that due to either a sluggish realm or casual raiding attitude on the Darrowmere realm that my Alliance guild has been faltering. Regardless of the many attempts to recruit new members we were often left with empty nights of no raiding. Couple in no-shows, elitist PuGs, and overall disatisfaction with how things were progressing and it made for an unhappy game experience. For a while, I began to make excuses to not show up. However on the days I did muster up the courage to attend raid nights I was either met with outright silence or disdain.

Recently my health had dropped to the point of not being able to even sit at the desk much less retain enough concentration to raid. The right thing to do was to let the raid team know what was going on. I was told that everything was all right and when I felt better then I would be welcomed back. A few days ago I found out via Facebook private messages from a guildie that it was an outright lie. The silence and disdain was due to not even being considered a part of the raid team anymore.

Furthermore, I also was told that the raid team split off to join more progressive guilds. It was hinted this was all due to my absence(and also of my husband's) and that I was an unreliable player. Even if the person that mentioned this statement also later on attempted to retract what he had said; the fact remains that it was thought to be true.

At least I still have the good memories to reflect upon.

Reflections
At first, I honestly did not put much thought about the people behind the monitor. I believe it wasn't until I actually took time to get to know everyone within the guilds I played within that my opinion on e-friendships truly began to change. And it was about the time I met a very special lady whom to this day still supports me through the most harrowing of times that I finally learned that cyber friends could truly become real friends. Let me quote something I had written in the past, "Gradually, as our toons fought side by side against many a hard foe; friendships formed. As we grouped together, and smashed our heads against raid bosses, a strong bond between us was created." An unbreakable link, I had thought that would never be broken. In regards to the Alliance guild I now no longer play with; I was completely wrong.

Did you know? I was only 50 embers away from my Legendary staff. Never got it.

For three years I had thought we were all friends. Not e-friends, not team members, but actual friends. We shared and went through so many things it felt like real friendship to me. Except that I learned over the past few days that it wasn't like that at all. I was the only one that believed the guild mates I raided with over the years were not simply pixels. And let me tell you, it pains me to realize that it was all in my head. I had unwittingly hurt myself by thinking otherwise.

With my head held high I will continue forward.

Which brings me to the question, are cyber friends the same as in real life friends? Over the years I have played in this game I have often wondered about it. The players you find within game are people that will never see your facial expressions, nor hear the tone of your voice as you type or view your body language. Despite finding a sole exception that led me to believe that e-friendship was possible in the past. I currently cannot answer that question with absolute clarity anymore. I suppose that alike most things a person can only tell with time. And only through the roughest of challenges will one discover that some friendships will become closer and others will simply drift away. In that regard, e-friends are alike real life friends. Just as all of this, good or bad,  the memories you create together in the game become a part of your life.

Thank you for reading!